Review of INTIMATE SPEAKERS

Author BIJU .P.R

No of pages   250

Publish by: FINGER PRINT

PUBLISHED ON 

ISBN  978 81 7599 429 4 

Genre :NONFICTION SOCIAL  MEMOIR

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Author's Links  Goodreads  Website 

General

"INTIMATE SPEAKERS Why introverts and socially ostracized citizens use social media"
is a compilation of thoughts and experiences in the virtual world of  Internet and social media   by Biju P.R.  Writer, teacher and blogger .The  author   has depicted his personal encounters  and the happenings in the country along with the findings from the eminent scholars .There are three parts, each gives a different picture of  the activities of netizens , woman empowerment through the  Internet, and sexual activism of  lesbian,,gay,bisexuals,transgenders and inter-sex (LGBT). One chapter relates to Dalits .The crux of the book  is the fact that we are all becoming Intimate speakers in this virtual world ,

The other day my neighbour has asked  me ," We  have become his Facebook friends. Why you are  not putting any Like ,Comment, or Share for my posts whereas I am doing it on your posts?" It has not occurred to me this is a big issue and I have felt bad . My backwardness  in the virtual world makes me  an odd man out. This book has enlightened me on all facets of Internet and Social media.

The title of the book Intimate speakers  is a powerful eye-catching one and it shows  the sea- change that has taken place in our country after advent of Internet and social media like Facebook ,Twitter. and WhatsApp.

You are buying the electronics gadget like smart phone at the cost of more than 10K . This book comes to you as a great guide and the investment  of Rs 250/ worthful one and it is a best buy for all the clarifications and discussions  . Nuggets of wisdom   will definitely help you  to handle Internet and social media in a proactive and productive  way . You will get  a pukka direction  and the journey in the online world will be a happy one without any hassle . All bibliophiles want to have this book on their shelf as it is a great reference one on the  Internet and social media.

Biju.P.R has penned this book with a passion  coupled with   scholarly  craftsmanship with a lot of research.  His language is fresh,precise and  magnificent.   The narration is interesting  His proficiency in this filed has made  this book a great success. He  has used the word 'space' frequently .This  indicates the impact of the  Internet on the lifestyle of Indians and the effects of social media in their routine life.There is a poem written by him shows his flair for literature.

Social and historical context :

The book starts with the preface on Intimate speaker's Code of Conduct.It elaborates the  feelings  of the author on his personal challenges ,and events in his virtual world from the year 1991 to up to date.The book deals with all the subjects related to  the cyber world like cybersex, digital market cyberspace,to name a few., It covers various social media like Facebook,Twitter, YouTube,Orkut Blogger , Wordpress, Skype, WhatsApp  and SNSs. It talks about the chat platforms like social networking sites ,matrimonial sites etc Also It tells about the  impact of these media in the life of an ordinary Indian  in the context of his social life as well as personal life.

My favorite

The following conclusions  by the author have got my attention.

Social media was becoming a loudspeaker for the new kind of speakers in the age of instant and constant connections.

Social web became a real test of the liberal characters of Indians cherished and idealized democracy over the years.

Though a slight exaggeration our clicks or finger touches can bring about  a biggest change.

Internet has become a new mantra for liberation and empowerment.

Connectivity enables the death of common culture.

Internet is like the Pandors's Box for women and sexual dissenters.

Life is like a walk in the rain. You can either take shelter or get wet.

Internet gives a sense of invisibility to women

Facebook and WhatsApp were their second homes.

Internet has become increasingly accommodative to sexual minorities.

My verdict

I like this book for all the messages it carries on Internet  and Social Media .I also admire the way   the book deals with cyber citizenship so that we live in the  virtual world  with all the peace , happiness and harmony . I recommend this book to all, a good  buy and must read by parents,teachers,students ,bloggers and  professionals  I find the End notes very useful and informative.

My rating  5/5

Disclaimer :  I received the book from the publisher  in exchange for my honest review 

SMILE- A STEPPING STONE FOR SUCCESS

  LIVE EVERYDAY FULLY AS      IF IT WERE  YOUR LAST

                                               Buddha

courtesy

      THE WIDER OUR SMILE

      THE MERRIER OUR JOURNEY    

Smiling invigorates our  spirit tranquilizes mind,buoy ups heart and produce an ecstatic chord of euphony  in others soul.The innocent  and invaluable  smile of the kids is alluring us  to intoxicate us like the fragrance of the flowers and the evening breeze.

Wise people say those who don’t smile should never open a shop. It attracts others like magnet drawing iron  . Service with smile is a sweet mantra of service- orientated corporate firms.It is contagious and makes the atmosphere pleasant and delightful.

The best time we should smile is when we get up in the morning. We should look into the mirror and say to ourselves with a smile “ The day is going to be great”.  

If we smile whenever we meet our friends and relatives we spur on friendliness and fondness.

When we come upon  our friends or relatives  after a long time , we  exchange  pleasantries , we extend our right hand to shake (not Golden handshake ) and smile.

Some people use to hug them as a token of respect and regard. If we meet elders, we use to lie down flat to seek their blessings.In Japan when people meet others they bow their head  exhibiting their humility.

Say a louder NO with a big SMILE

 My colleague , in the office, a happy-to-go-shrewd guy is having the habit  always smiling when we are behind the counters servicing the customers. I use to look at him awestruck as he does not get provoked easily and always keep his cool and temperament . 

When we are working together at the counters I observe him as a good student taking a lesson from his teacher. His way of tackling the unreasonable ,unethical and illogical demands of the customers is exemplary . 

With a smile he would be conversing with the clients in such a way to making reason out and  fathom why he is helpless. He would handle any situation with great aplomb and equanimity in a diplomatic and prudent way  so as to avoid any confrontation ,argument , dispute or disappointment .

 If  we use  to smile always and it becomes a part and parcel of our system, it gives so many good results ranging from good health to a great relationship.

Smile when the situation warrants.

We should not smile at strangers as they may misconstrue as mockery or they take as nincompoops. It is better we keep a restraint to smile always. Suppose if we go to any office for one or other transaction, we may come upon unknown persons. We can smile at them .They would also feel comfortable with us and extend a helping hand.

Thunbam varungal naguga - A Tamil proverb.

It is to mean that we should laugh when the mishap strikes us.   Nowadays Psychologists stress  that we should not curtail  the negative emotions as life has got its own ups and downs .We have to express our agony and anguish by wailing.

We are not robots.We take a pledge to fill the air with ecstasy utilizing the melodious music of smiling. We fill the atmosphere full of  hopefulness , harmony and joy with our grinning ear to ear.

When we entertain nefarious , wrong and negative thoughts we pour out a plastic or fake  smile . As such if we hold positive and right thoughts of optimism . hopefulness, and compassion our smile would be a beguiling and genuine matter.

Sumptuous smile secures success 

Youngsters want to connect  with others always by roaming in the  on-line world.  In the social media like Face-book ,Twitter and whatsApp they are active and use the  Smiley to express their emotions 

 This is OK with virtual world.In real mundane but crazy world where the society is becoming interactive you have to  add a touch of elegance to your social life by your SMILE. As you are using smiley in your social media accounts, in the real world you should smile to win the hearts of others.

EMBRACE SMILE CULTURE AND SUSTAIN A HAPPY 

 SOCIAL LIFE  AND MAKE OTHERS ALSO SMILE .

JEALOUSY IS A JEOPARDY OF JOY

THERE WILL NEVER BE ANOTHER NOW. I WILL MAKE THE MOST  OF TODAY THERE WILL NEVER BE ANOTHER ME . I WILL MAKE THE MOST  OF MYSELF.

                                   ROBERT .H. SCHEULLER

              Be jealous

                         Be joyless

COURTESY

Jealousy and joy will never go together. We have to sacrifice one for the other.Whenever we entertain it we deprive ourselves of  JOYFULNESS .

We are envious of others when we mind 

 their knowledge and skill

 their richness and fortunes

 their status and influence

 their health and well being
 their beauty and handsomeness

 their positions and qualification

Like this the list goes. Actually the other person having curly hair on his head gives all the reason for us to think  jealously.If this trivial matter counts ,the bigger things give room for all the unmindful thoughts of jealousy .  

When we look at rich and pojwerful people we have to see their efforts and learn lesson from their life. Jealousy will make us blind to see the struggles and sacrifices they have made.

We hear stories of rich people’s life full of stress and strain ,whereas poor people have got a peaceful and contented life with good slumber  and natural appetite.

When we come upon beautiful and handsome people we should understand the fact they are born like this and there is nothing to be envied. Celebrities and outstanding artists have their own hurdles and obstacles in the form of hectic schedule and incomputable pressures to perform .

 Outwardly some people appear attractive , but their heart will be dark with selfishness and crookedness.Some they look awkward outward and not good looking ,but they may have a golden heart with  a magnanimous mind .

Jealousy

Kills friendship and other relationship

Spoils our energy and time

Cuts the social fabric of togetherness
spurs untrustworthiness  and unpleasantness 

Compassion is the best antidote to jealousy.  In this world ,every one is struggling to balance in his personal  and social life. Whether we want or not we have to wear a social mask to survive in this society. Life does not need to be fair to all at all times. Sometimes life would be unfair and everyone is put into myriad trails and tribulations. Turmoils and triumphs are common to all.Some people struggle to make both ends meet.Some juggle to multitasking  and undertaking  different roles . 

Jealousy will lead us to talk in an unscrupulous manner  and it hurts others.Words are to be used as we value a diamond if we want to lead a happy and peaceful  life.Silence is golden. When we utter a word ,it becomes our master. Still ,it is in our mind we are masters of words.

When we talk ill of others we display jealousy . It creates bad image and harms  the otherwise good relationship. When we make ourselves busy by being active always we won’t get time to entertain evil thoughts about others.Also we  should develop the correct mindset by taking the following steps:

We give a shoulder to share others burdens

We talk only the positive facets of life .

We look for the good aspect in others .

We help others who are suffering and in distress ,

We support the weak and poor people financially

We extend moral support to those who suffer from physical and 

mental illness.

We act with humility and humanity as we don’t know what is in            the store for us.

                                           COURTESY 

                                          GENUINE JOYFULNESS COMES FROM GOOD FRIENDS

                                          AND SOUND HEALTH,TRY TO ACHIEVE IT AND FOSTER                                                                      THAT OF  OTHERS    

ANGER -AN EVITABLE HOST AND AN INEVITABLE GUEST

IF YOU WANT YOUR LIFE TO BE A MAGNIFICENT STORY , THEN BEGIN BY REALIZING THAT YOU ARE THE AUTHOR AND EVERYDAY YOU HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO WRITE A NEW PAGE.

                          MARK HOULAHAN

                                                   Courtesy

                                 AVOID ANGER

                ACHIEVE ALL

Anger is compared to fire as it destroys our as well as others peace of mind and happiness .

 If we stand up with anger, we have to sit with loss.

Why do we get angry?

What are  its consequences ?

How to handle it prudently?

  Unmet needs ,desires aspirations,  unexpected failures, trying circumstances , unpleasant situations, inexplicable and inevitable ordeals ,and undue demands and pressures are the triggers to make us angry.

We may feel angry at our own helplessness,  the failures and setbacks  we face in our life,  the sudden sacrifices we have to make , and the odd and eccentric  behavior of our friends and relatives provoking us in one way or other.

Suppose on a Monday morning you are ready  to go to your office .You have to drop your son at  his school on your way.. At  that time your son is searching for his ID. You will get angry .

You can react as follows:

You may not  get tension and you help your son to get his ID. You warn him to be more responsible in future.

You may scold him.

You may beat him also

You may go to the office alone .  

. 

Sometimes we may feel angry towards ourselves Most of the time our anger will be targeting others as they may be the reason for such a situation by their actions.

We show our anger in different ways.

Some will play it cool and don’t react at all but keep silent.

Some may whisper and talk to themselves

Some will shout and use abusive words ,

Some talk sarcastically wounding others

Some act violently and causing psychical injury.

Some give mental torture .     .

Some may  forget themselves and commit heinous crimes like murder .

Even war is born out  of anger.

Angry people are wicked ,vindictive, and some may commit crimes .If we yield to our anger we may ignore the result and it may create many a problem..

If we try to see the positive aspect and the  silver lining of any incident  which is capable of instigating anger in us we can manage the same and thereby we can escape the consequence .

If we develop a simple and humble persona and give no room for our anger we would be respected and we would be trusted also.

Sometimes youth belongs to the present young generation try to vent their anger through the social media like Facebook , Twitter, and Whats App.It may give a short-lived  kick, but in the long run it affects your personality.  This virtual world holds all the principles applicable to our civilized society.When we put  some awkward and unacceptable  postings we expose ourselves as weak and ill-mannered persons . As the ball  thrown towards the wall comes back to us we have to bear the brunt of our own mischief actions which affects  our social life.

To control our anger, we should follow the following two rules.

Rule No 1
Imagine your mind as a garden
Put up fence made of wit and wisdom to safeguard from wrong, negative and selfish thoughts
Grow only plants that fetch fruits of  love and affection 
and flowers of tolerance and togetherness to enjoy the tranquility and happiness

Rule No 2
Remember the rule No 1 and revisit your garden and renovate 

Live a more fulfilling life and help others to do the same.

Review of A walk in the Rain

A walk in the Rain 
No.of pages :236 

                                                         Publisher : Kyron publications

 Published on   January 7th 2015
Genre: Young adult crime contemporary fiction.

Book Links : Goodreads   Flipkart  Amazon

Author's Links   Facebook Twitter  Goodreads 

My review :

“A walk in the Rain” is an adult youth crime thriller. It is a story of rivalry and terror of  young generation taking place in a city.

I like the novel for its fast paced nature and the turns and twists enthrall me. The suspense and thrill it carries have got my attention to read the entire book at a stretch and only after finishing the same I have felt relaxed. Such a fantastic and gripping social drama will linger in my mind for a longer time.

 

The readers would like this book for the realistic and adventurous events and the nail-biting suspense will entertain every one.Every chapter gives a new picture of pain and success .You can get the feeling of incidents happening in front of you. It has got romance , love ,lust ,and revenge to be fit for making a movie script.

Udai Yadla , the author has narrated the story in a direct and simple manner.He has carved the words in a splendid way  and   the flow is spontaneous to make the reading enjoyable and chilling sometimes.

The Plot :

Surya ,also called Sunny the protagonist has lost his mother when he was born and his father has not supported him fully. He has to struggle to come up in life . He befriends Imran his school mate and happens to save him in a fight that has taken place between him and Micheal belongs to a rival group in a bar.Also Sunny has developed love towards Sandhya .When they grow up once Imran asks Sunny to accompany him to a brothel .There he meets Saloni a sex worker.The story goes on to reveal so many surprises . There are so many sub-plots and they are given in a chronological order with time factor.

My favorite :

I like the sub plot which gives an account of the deep love between Sunny and Sandy when they are studying in the same class. They lie for the sake of each other and get punished by their  teacher.

I admire the Saloni character, as she is well versed in the mobile technology.She is very confident and bold . Actually she is carrying the most part of the story. She is a model for woman empowerment.

I also like Sam who had a positive approach of life . He was orphaned twice he never complained .  He believed the  only form of god is love.

  

I like the following quotes of wisdom.

The biggest sin in the world is not being able to love someone. Do not judge anybody by what thy are , because life may have played unfair with them.

The fruit of crime is bitter.

Chastity is not an attribute of body,but soul.

It is a jungle out there.There are hungry predators on the prowl.If you are helpless, they will hound you .

My verdict :

I like the characterization. All the characters including MCs Sunny and Saloni , Pooja , Victor , Hari ,Imran ,are both good and bad people. Both concept and execution are great .I recommend this book to all who are fans of crime fiction.

My rating : 4/5

Disclaimer : I received the book in exchange for my honest review from Writersmelon. 

  

EGO IS YOUR ENEMY

You are the architect of your own destiny,you are the master of your own fate; you are behind the steering wheel of your life. There are  limitations to what you can do ,have or become .Accept the limitations you place on yourself by your own thinking.

Brain Tracyery.

ERASE EGO

 ENJOY LIFE

Ego means" A person’s sense of self-esteem or self -importance"- according  to British Dictionary. From womb to tomb we are carrying this Ego as a God’s gift and actually it is not a blessing but a curse.

Ego is venomous and vindictive

Ego is harmful and sickening

Ego is dangerous and unforgiving

Ego is evil and ill-tempered

Ego leads to think about yourself and do not allows you to see from the point of view of others. Ego is always selfish and it  gives room for all the negative thinking about others . Ego is your own enemy and works against your well being and peace of mind.

To cite an example the following incident is given.

In a reputed  company ,the manager of a particular section called one of his subordinates and scolded him for a mishap, not fully aware of the reason behind it.Later he realized his mistake and he wanted to seek apology from him.Here Ego prevented him from doing the same and he postponed it .Meanwhile the   person  died in an accident.   The manager is left with the scar and guilt  to  live the rest  of his life.His conscience pricks and he is losing his peace of mind.But for his ego he would have gone to his subordinate  and accept his mistake.

The incident clearly shows that the manager has given more weightage  to his age, education, knowledge, experience, and superiority. But mistake is mistake and to err is human.He should have called him in person and told  who is to be blamed for such a mishap .

 We should control our ego as it misguides us.  We make mistake and take a hasty decision wounding others .Had he given a thought to maintain coolness and ignore what our ego says he would have avoided such an unpleasant situation. 

There is nothing to feel pride and arrogant as we have got our own limitations and weakness. Everybody is unique and blessed with strengths and opportunities. All are born equal. Everyone likes to be respected and  treated well .

Courtesy

Three golden rules to be followed to keep your EGO under control.

1. We should adhere to virtuous living by speaking the language of love and affection . Ego will take  the back seat .
2.We  should develop  a  feedback switch in your mind to review the interactions with others by  our words and actions .  Wherever and whenever it is necessary, we have to be flexible and if we are wrong we should never hesitate to correct ourselves .
3. Deal with others' ego as you deal with our own .

LIVE YOUR LIFE MORE MEANINGFUL AND HELP OTHERS   LEAD A  HAPPY  LIFE